Afternoon review

It's amazing how quickly I start blogging again when my weight crap begins to get back on the track.
It is a real connundrum, y'all.

I feel better when I am in control-- I immediately begin to feel thinner and better.  I do have a ways to go on this reset.
But I also feel really deprived and my mind often goes to "oh, I wish I could eat this... I wish I could eat that" and "I want to eat anything I want..." etc etc.

But let me get back to: I genuinely feel better that I am taking steps to gain control.

I am not sure who I am kidding in my previous post when I say that I don't mean to lose weight on a liquid diet-- I mean WTF?  Let me clarify: of course, I hope this would kick start my weight loss.
I guess what I meant was that a liquid diet is not sustainable in the long term and I know that... it takes a lot of mental effort to NOT eat when that's what you're used to...
I am trying to respond to hunger with protein shakes-- I'm up to about 600 calories for the day so far.  I am having a cup of coffee right now b/c I am beginning to feel draggy, tired and out of it, though I don't know if that is what I've eaten or not vs. just being tired.
Gotta run.
I have a personal training session in the AM, just a notation.

Edited to add:
We just planned a week long vacation to Jamaica (good thing we have our babysitter across the street who will be in our house each day to take care of our animal menagerie of a dog, cat and bird! ) and it will quickly be coming up.
This will be the week right after the little one finishes 1st grade and includes my hubs' 42nd birthday.
I am psyched.

Just 13 days until we leave. Now that is some serious motivation for me!!
Off to Athle*ta for some bathing gear and cover ups.

Reset time

I've decided to try a liquid diet today and perhaps tomorrow.  I am literally going to take it one day at a time.
The liquid diet is not to lose weight but like the 5 day p*ouch test-- I'm just not necessarily committing to the full 5 day pt.  I would like to see if I can reset myself. It makes it very easy, per say, to be on a liquid diet. Here is goes: drink protein shakes, diet drinks, coffee.
Don't chew anything. Done.
The more variety there is, the harder it gets.  Simplify y'all. Now I just need to do it.

Reading about the 5 day pt really gave me some insight and hope though.  I've known the entire time that there are others who struggle after weight loss surgery and that I am not alone, but reading that people are able to pull themselves back on track and use their tool to their advantage was truly motivating.

I can tell you upon waking up-- I immediately thought about eating something!!!
Reset button, please.

Upping the exercise-- and looking down the line to another adjustment (methinks)

I'm definitely struggling with appetite and cravings... but I am increasing the exercise.  Planning to do a liquids day tomorrow and if that works, perhaps Monday too (Hoping to 'reset' in the simplest way I know.)

I am determined-- and I will keep searching for the right way to do things until I work it out.

I did my personal training session on Friday and have another one set for Monday. I also ordered a very intensive exercise program on DVDs, have you heard of I*NSAN*ITY?
Take the stars out and google it-- I may be crazy, but I like the idea of intensive exercise and working towards a goal like the ones that the DVDs talk about.  I just need to be careful so I don't hurt myself with this intensive exercise.

As for an adjustment-- I have an appointment set for NEXT Weds (a week from this coming Wednesday.)  So, I think I'm keeping that appointment b/c I think I need more help.

Yep-- more to follow.

Oh, observation: it's a lot easier to blog when you're doing well and losing weight or maintaining than when you're struggling to hold the line.
But here you have the honest facts along the way-- and there is something worth saying that too.